Each of us makes decisions about our own physical and psychological health and wellness. Much of our personal illness and injury is created by lifestyle choices related to destructive habits in eating, exercise, cleanliness, drinking, smoking, drug use, and reckless driving.
President Obama, in his discussion on health care reform policies, emphasized preventive health care, urging all of us to take more responsibility for our own health.
Chruches are also adding health and wellness dimensions to their ministry, a practice that is consistent with the concerns of Jesus for healing and wholeness.
Restoring the health of our family relationships and sexual behaviors should be a priority concern in our move toward health care reform. Both religious and secular education needs to include rigorous preparation for healthy sexual, marriage and family relationships, beginning with children and increasing for teens and older.
"The devastating impact of marital and family breakdown on individuals and on our society as a whole has been well documented, yet too often we stand by helplessly while families fall apart. We often fail to provide the relationship education and support needed to build strong families whose members enjoy each other and cope effectively with life's challenges...
We can learn the skills to build healthy relationships;
we can unravel the emotional tangles that sabotage our families;
we can build on family strengths to establish the deep friendship and mutual commitment that undergirds lasting marriages and healthy families." 1.
Many organizations and resources provide help in the development of family relationship growth. (marriagelovepower.net)
Classes on marriage enrichment and parenting skills should be offered on a continuing basis, with classes focusing on premarital counseling, different stages of marriage, and childhood development.
HEALTHY SEXUALITY
Modern social influences are bombarding us with enticement into dangerous and destructive sexual behaviors that too often result in debilitating disease, broken trust, broken relationships, and broken lives.
Healthy sexuality focuses on ultimate concern for the individual lives involved and ultimate concern for the lives of children who develop from sexual togetherness.
PORNOGRAPHY DISTORTS HEALTHY SEXUALITY
Speaking out against the dangers of pornography and educating people, especially young people, about lustful addictions and sexual distortions that grow from pornographic images is an essential and valuable concern for health and wellness.
PREMARITAL ABSTINENCE AND FAITHFUL MONOGAMY WITHIN MARRIAGE
Our contemporary society is presenting sex as a toy for personal pleasure, even to the young. Tragic consequences related to sexually transmitted diseases, loss of self esteem, broken trust, children born out-of-wedlock, and abortion become the reality for too many people. Young people need to be given the understanding and commitment to resist the temptations of careless sexuality.
An understanding of the importance of sexual abstinence before marriage and faithful monogamy after marriage is a foundation for healthy sexual behaviors.
THE DANGERS OF 'SAFE SEX'
The careless double talk of 'safe sex' and the handing out of condoms, even to middle school students, puts sexual health in jeopardy. Condoms are not safe. They have a 14% actual use failure rate, a failure rate of 1 out of 6 or 7 time. This amounts to Russian roulette sex. The common use of the phrase 'safe sex' in regard to condom use is cruel, dangerous and careless.
THE SANCTITY OF LIFE IS THREATENED
Healthy living is a call to respect the value of each life, and a call to order our lives in ways that we support and cherish our own life and the lives of others.
Since 1973, abortion has taken the lives of over 50 million infants. About 80%
of abortions are performed on unmarried women, as young women are told that a fetus is 'merely a mass of tissue' rather than a developing child.
The development of the ultrasound machine is allowing women to respect and watch the growth of their child. Pregnancy centers are protecting and educating women in the development of their child.
Women who feel that they are unable to raise a child can be supported in their pregnancy and encouraged to offer their children to loving couples seeking a child to adopt.
PROTECTING TRADITIONAL FAMILY RELATIONSHIPS
Heterosexual marriage is primarily a social issue. It becomes a religious concern and a political concern because it is a foundation for social integration, freedom, reproduction and health.
The normalization of homosexuality in society would create profound changes in social organization that warrant caution and serious consideration rather than the heated arguments that are being generated.
Social Integration -
The traditional family is the building block for the integration of society as members grow in understanding of various perspectives within the family. In spite of immense variation within the sexes, there remain fundamental differences in biological and psychological make up. Heterosexual marriage seeks to integrate these elements into a caring unit.
As men relate intimately to men and women to women, social disintegration will occur.
Social Freedom -
The family preserves and passes down its unique cultural values to the next generation, providing checks and balances in society which guard against destructive extremism. Homosexuality will jeopardize the intergenerational transfer of cultural patterns within society.
Social Reproduction -
Homosexuality will jeopardize social reproduction and the intergenerational transfer of genetic patterns. Reproduction will necessitate contrivance and manipulation, buying and selling.
Social Health -
Personal health risks associated with homosexual behavior are deeply troubling. According to the American Medical Association, homosexual youth are 23 times more apt to contact a sexually transmitted disease than their heterosexual counterparts. In the U.S., men who have sex with men account for 60-70% of estimated HIV infections, although they represent only 5-7% of the population.
CAUTION IS WISDOM -
Countless research studies confirm that the greatest sources of nurture, support and meaning for the majority of Americans are found within the family unit. Legal constraints maintain a sense of appropriateness. Extending the range of permissible behavior will put in jeopardy social integration, freedom, social reproduction, and social health.
HEALTH AND WELLNESS BEGINS WITH US AND OUR PERSONAL CHOICES.
1.United Methodist Marriage Ministries (Overview). www.marriagelovepower.net.
Showing posts with label Marriage enrichment. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Marriage enrichment. Show all posts
Thursday, July 2, 2009
Sunday, August 10, 2008
When Organizations and Families Collide
Most Americans continue to find their greatest sources of nurture, support, and meaning within their family experiences.
In our modern society, however, we are spending an increasing amount of time in bureaucratic organizational involvements, away from our families.
Organizations, while offering support and services for families and individuals, may challenge and compete with family involvements. Organizations may view members as commodities to expand and increase the organizational program, with little thought or concern about how the involvements may affect relationships within the family unit.
Social analyst, Eugene Litwak, contends that both organizations and strong family relationships are essential for the maintenance of an industrial society. He notes that organizations provide efficient, objective, transitory, and specialized services, while the family and kinship units provide the personal, emotional, diffuse, and permanent support and guidance necessary for personal development. 1.
THE FAMILY REALM IS DIFFERENT
The family realm differs from relationships in bureaucratic organizations. The expectations for interactions within these two realms are usually quite different.
Researchers in the Department of Family Sciences of Brigham Young University identified seven characteristics that distinguish the 'ideal' family realm from organizational experiences. 2.
1. Family relationships are generational and permanent.
* Organizations have specific goals of interest for a limited time period.
2. Family relationships involve 'whole persons' for better and worse with respect for the unique qualities of the members.
* Organizations involve people in a 'role' relationship, structured to avoid
contradictions.
3. Family relationships are multidimensional. Many processes are occurring at once, often becoming irrational and disordered. Actions and feelings must be juggled simultaneously.
* Organizational activities are focused, sequential, ordered, and temporary.
4. Families develop emotional intensity that includes not only feelings of love, but also feelings of concern worry, and anger.
* Feelings toward organizational colleagues are less intense and holistic.
5. Family relationships focus on measures of the quality of 'being' in an ongoing process of nurture.
* Organizations focus on quantity measures of achievement, profit, performance,
ratings, and rankings.
6. Family relationships include a sense of sacred responsibility and duty to other family members.
* Organizations include agreements and contracts for mutual advantage.
7. Family relationships are based on processes of caring, nurturing, persuading, and training to foster the growth and development of the members.
* Organizations treat members as commodities where people are hired, fired,
managed and manipulated.
LEARNING HOW TO LOVE FOREVER - EDUCATION FOR HEALTHY MARRIAGES AND FAMILIES
Our social education programs are failing to educate citizens in the skills necessary for the success of healthy marriage and family relationships. Without the ability to care and share, listen and communicate, manage anger, resolve conflicts and forgive, relationships within families become destructive and broken.
In 1995, the Council on Families, which includes prominent social researchers and proponents of religious and social policy, issued a report entitled Marriage in America: A Report to the Nation. They contend that "The divorce revolution...has failed. It has created terrible hardships for children, incurred unsupportable social costs, and failed to deliver on its promise of greater adult happiness... Making marriage in America stronger will require a fundamental shift in cultural values and public policy. No one sector of society is responsible for the decline in marriage... We are all part of the problem, and therefore we all must be part of the solution." 3.
The Council on Families concludes that educational, religious, civic, business, political, and health organizations must all work together to regain the personal
and social value of marriage and family relationships.
In light of the importance of continuing family relationships for personal support, and concerns for the tragic breakdown of family relationships and social cost to individuals and society, it is essential that our educational organizations, including our schools, churches and other community support groups, offer training in the unique processes that support marriage and family nurture and enrichment.
WE CAN LEARN TO LOVE FOREVER! It's time to move forward and make it happen!
REFERENCES:
1. Litwak, Eugene. "Extended kin relations in an industrial society." In
Social Structure and the Family: Generational Relations.E. Shanas and B.F. Streib. Englewood Cliff, NJ: Prentice Hall. 1965:290-323.
2. Beutler, Ivan R., Wesley R. Burr and Kathleen S. Bahr. "The family realm: theoretical contributions for understanding its uniqueness." Journal of Marriage and the Family. Vol.51(August)1989:805-816.
3. Council on Families. Marriage in America: A Report to the Nation. 1995.
www.americanvalues.org/html/r-marriage_in_america.
In our modern society, however, we are spending an increasing amount of time in bureaucratic organizational involvements, away from our families.
Organizations, while offering support and services for families and individuals, may challenge and compete with family involvements. Organizations may view members as commodities to expand and increase the organizational program, with little thought or concern about how the involvements may affect relationships within the family unit.
Social analyst, Eugene Litwak, contends that both organizations and strong family relationships are essential for the maintenance of an industrial society. He notes that organizations provide efficient, objective, transitory, and specialized services, while the family and kinship units provide the personal, emotional, diffuse, and permanent support and guidance necessary for personal development. 1.
THE FAMILY REALM IS DIFFERENT
The family realm differs from relationships in bureaucratic organizations. The expectations for interactions within these two realms are usually quite different.
Researchers in the Department of Family Sciences of Brigham Young University identified seven characteristics that distinguish the 'ideal' family realm from organizational experiences. 2.
1. Family relationships are generational and permanent.
* Organizations have specific goals of interest for a limited time period.
2. Family relationships involve 'whole persons' for better and worse with respect for the unique qualities of the members.
* Organizations involve people in a 'role' relationship, structured to avoid
contradictions.
3. Family relationships are multidimensional. Many processes are occurring at once, often becoming irrational and disordered. Actions and feelings must be juggled simultaneously.
* Organizational activities are focused, sequential, ordered, and temporary.
4. Families develop emotional intensity that includes not only feelings of love, but also feelings of concern worry, and anger.
* Feelings toward organizational colleagues are less intense and holistic.
5. Family relationships focus on measures of the quality of 'being' in an ongoing process of nurture.
* Organizations focus on quantity measures of achievement, profit, performance,
ratings, and rankings.
6. Family relationships include a sense of sacred responsibility and duty to other family members.
* Organizations include agreements and contracts for mutual advantage.
7. Family relationships are based on processes of caring, nurturing, persuading, and training to foster the growth and development of the members.
* Organizations treat members as commodities where people are hired, fired,
managed and manipulated.
LEARNING HOW TO LOVE FOREVER - EDUCATION FOR HEALTHY MARRIAGES AND FAMILIES
Our social education programs are failing to educate citizens in the skills necessary for the success of healthy marriage and family relationships. Without the ability to care and share, listen and communicate, manage anger, resolve conflicts and forgive, relationships within families become destructive and broken.
In 1995, the Council on Families, which includes prominent social researchers and proponents of religious and social policy, issued a report entitled Marriage in America: A Report to the Nation. They contend that "The divorce revolution...has failed. It has created terrible hardships for children, incurred unsupportable social costs, and failed to deliver on its promise of greater adult happiness... Making marriage in America stronger will require a fundamental shift in cultural values and public policy. No one sector of society is responsible for the decline in marriage... We are all part of the problem, and therefore we all must be part of the solution." 3.
The Council on Families concludes that educational, religious, civic, business, political, and health organizations must all work together to regain the personal
and social value of marriage and family relationships.
In light of the importance of continuing family relationships for personal support, and concerns for the tragic breakdown of family relationships and social cost to individuals and society, it is essential that our educational organizations, including our schools, churches and other community support groups, offer training in the unique processes that support marriage and family nurture and enrichment.
WE CAN LEARN TO LOVE FOREVER! It's time to move forward and make it happen!
REFERENCES:
1. Litwak, Eugene. "Extended kin relations in an industrial society." In
Social Structure and the Family: Generational Relations.E. Shanas and B.F. Streib. Englewood Cliff, NJ: Prentice Hall. 1965:290-323.
2. Beutler, Ivan R., Wesley R. Burr and Kathleen S. Bahr. "The family realm: theoretical contributions for understanding its uniqueness." Journal of Marriage and the Family. Vol.51(August)1989:805-816.
3. Council on Families. Marriage in America: A Report to the Nation. 1995.
www.americanvalues.org/html/r-marriage_in_america.
Tuesday, June 24, 2008
It Pays to Enrich Your Marriage and Family!
We're losing it!
Too many of us have already lost it!
As our homes and families dissolve in angry confrontations and/or divorce, we're
losing too much of value.
I'm out of here!
The development of no-fault divorce laws in the 1970's made it easy to end a marriage. Increasingly, people found it easier to leave a marriage than to work through even natural and normal problems of family disagreement. Divorce often, even usually, leaves one partner feeling betrayed and the children feeling rejected and deserted.
Don't lose it!
The majority of Americans continues to find their greatest sources of nurture, support, and meaning within their family experiences. Strong marriages build a strong foundation for parenting children.
LET'S INVEST IN MARRIAGE ENRICHMENT.1.
Today's marriages must be held together from the inside - by the actions of the partners themselves.
Marriages have to be strong enough to withstand the stress and lifetime of changes that occur during adulthood.
In addition, most couples have high expectations for their marriages. They expect joy and fulfillment - not just survival.
Excellent marriages do not just happen.
It's a decision to 'make our love last'.
Marriage enrichment is the process of making marriage better, happier and more satisfying. Marriage enrichment activities develop skills in affirming each other, conflict resolution and caring communication.
Learning to Love!
Marriage enrichment is different from marriage counseling or therapy. It's an educational learning process. By taking a growth and educational approach rather than treatment, marriage enrichment can benefit any couple.
An excellent source for information on programs and processes of marriage enrichment can be found at www.bettermarriages.org. This is the website of the Association for Couples in Marriage Enrichment.
Check it out!
Marriage enrichment is the best investment you can make for yourself, your future, your children, and your family!.
1. "Building Better Marriages." Brochure of ACME. Association for Couples in Marriage Enrichment. Winston Salem, NC. www.bettermarriages.org.
Too many of us have already lost it!
As our homes and families dissolve in angry confrontations and/or divorce, we're
losing too much of value.
I'm out of here!
The development of no-fault divorce laws in the 1970's made it easy to end a marriage. Increasingly, people found it easier to leave a marriage than to work through even natural and normal problems of family disagreement. Divorce often, even usually, leaves one partner feeling betrayed and the children feeling rejected and deserted.
Don't lose it!
The majority of Americans continues to find their greatest sources of nurture, support, and meaning within their family experiences. Strong marriages build a strong foundation for parenting children.
LET'S INVEST IN MARRIAGE ENRICHMENT.1.
Today's marriages must be held together from the inside - by the actions of the partners themselves.
Marriages have to be strong enough to withstand the stress and lifetime of changes that occur during adulthood.
In addition, most couples have high expectations for their marriages. They expect joy and fulfillment - not just survival.
Excellent marriages do not just happen.
It's a decision to 'make our love last'.
Marriage enrichment is the process of making marriage better, happier and more satisfying. Marriage enrichment activities develop skills in affirming each other, conflict resolution and caring communication.
Learning to Love!
Marriage enrichment is different from marriage counseling or therapy. It's an educational learning process. By taking a growth and educational approach rather than treatment, marriage enrichment can benefit any couple.
An excellent source for information on programs and processes of marriage enrichment can be found at www.bettermarriages.org. This is the website of the Association for Couples in Marriage Enrichment.
Check it out!
Marriage enrichment is the best investment you can make for yourself, your future, your children, and your family!.
1. "Building Better Marriages." Brochure of ACME. Association for Couples in Marriage Enrichment. Winston Salem, NC. www.bettermarriages.org.
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