(12) Moving Toward Marriage: The Gay Battle for Social Reorganization of America

"We're here, we're queer, we're redefining the term 'family'." A 1992 study reported that 55% of gay men and 71% of lesbians were in committed or steady relationships. However, they were unable to marry and obtain the legal benefits of marriage, including insurance coverage as spouse and access to the hospital to visit a dying partner. Seeking to change this, lesbians and gay men created their own weddings and ceremonies. In 1993 at the third March on Washington for Lesbian, Gay, and Bisexual Rights three-thousand couples gathered for a mass wedding. That same year the Hawaii Supreme Court, in response to an appeal from a lower court decision denying marriage licenses to gay and lesbian couples, ruled that the prohibition of same-sex marriages constituted discrimination and was probably unconstitutional. 1.

The Lambda Legal Defense and Educational Fund had worked to lay a groundwork for winning the right for gays to marry. In 1995 they announced the formation of its Marriage Project to serve as a national coordinator and clearinghouse. A network of volunteer attorneys, law professors, and law students were mobilized to research legal arguments against backlash. The Project developed the Marriage Resolution:

"Because marriage is a fundamental right under our Constitution, and because the Constitution guarantees equal protection under the law, RESOLVED, the State should permit gay and lesbian couples to marry and share fully and equally in the rights and responsibilities of marriage." 2.

Federal and State Defense of Marriage Acts

When Hawaii became the first state to move toward gay marriage, other states and the Federal Government wrestled with the possibility that through the U.S. Constitution's "full faith and credit" clause they would be required to recognize same-sex marriages performed in Hawaii. In 1996 Congress adopted the federal Defense of Marriage Act (DOMA) with votes of 342 to 67 in the House and 85 to 14 in the Senate. DOMA was signed by President Clinton on Sept. 21, 1996. DOMA refined marriage for purposes of federal law. The "word 'marriage' means only a legal union between one man and one woman as husband and wife, and the word 'spouse' refers only to a person of the opposite sex who is a husband or a wife." 3.

In 1998, the Hawaiian movement toward same-sex marriage was rescinded when Hawaii and Alaska passed constitutional amendments supported by approximately 70% of the voters in each state to ensure that marriage could not be redefined by judges in the court system. 4.

In July of 2000 Vermont became the first U.S. state to recognize homosexual 'unions', marriages in virtually every legal sense. By May of 2001 80% of gay-union licenses had gone to nonresidents. Other states were concerned that gay activists would travel to Vermont, get 'married', return home and sue for legal recognition of their status. Many states made efforts to protect marriage from legal assault by passing a state Defense of Marriage Act. 5.

Promoting a Constitutional Amendment

Following a decision in June of 2003 by the U.S. Supreme Court striking down the nation's sodomy laws, the highest court in Massachusetts ruled, 4 to 3, in November of 2003 that same-sex marriage was permissible under the State's Constitution.

A growing concern developed about having courts set social agendas that hadn't been approved by the legislatures. Because of a concern that same-sex marriage activists would encourage federal courts to intervene in the debate over marriage to remove state law barriers to same-sex marriage, a movement developed in support for an amendment to the U.S. Constitution to ban gay marriages. A New York Times/CBS News poll in 2003 found that 55 % of Americans favored an amendment to the Constitution that would allow marriage only between a man and a woman.

Rep. Marilyn Musgrave, R-Colo., with 106 co-sponsors, introduced a constitutional amendment in the House in May of 2003, although the measure in the Senate had only a few supporters. Musgrave said,"...if the definition of marriage is to be changed, it should be done by the American people, not four judges in Massachusetts." President Bush voiced support saying, "I will support a constitutional amendment which would honor marriage between a man and a woman." 6.

State Scorecard on Same-Sex Marriage

By November of 2008, 37 states had established their own Defense of Marriage Acts, and 30 states had constitutional amendments protecting traditional marriage. The constitutional amendments to protect marriage as a union between one man and one woman were passed by typically large margins, crossing party lines. The vote passed in fifteen states by majorities between 70 and 86%. The vote passed in twenty-eight states by majorities of 55% or above.

By January of 2010, forty-one states prohibited same-sex marriage. 7.

However, same-sex marriage was gaining acceptance. As of early 2010, 6 states and the District of Columbia allowed same-sex marriage, although no state had legalized gay marriage by referendum of the people. Decisions by the State Supreme Court of Massachusetts (2003), Connecticut (2008) and Iowa (2009) ruled affirmatively on the legality of same-sex marriage.

In 2009, Vermont, Maine and New Hampshire passed same-sex marriage bills through legislative action. In November of 2009 the District of Columbia approved a same-sex marriage bill. 8.

Arguing for Gay Marriage

Jonathan Rauch's book Gay Marriage argues in favor of gay marriage. He writes, "I would say that marriage is two people's lifelong commitment, recognized by law and society to care for each other."..."They promise to look after each other and their children so society won't have to; in exchange, society deems them a family and provides an assortment of privileges, obligations, and caregiving tools...The example gay couples set by marrying instead of shacking up might even strengthen marriage itself." 9.

Other proponents of gay marriage fail to agree with Rauch about the importance of marriage as a social institution. Sociologist Judith Stacey views marriage as a flawed and dangerous institution. Her strategy is to deconstruct marriage's 'customary forms': marriage as between a man and a woman; marriage as between two people; and marriage as connected to sexuality and procreation. Many activists seek to deinstitutionalize marriage and weaken its public influence as an important step to larger goals. Ellen Willis, a professor at New York University, foresees other changes. "For starters, if homosexual marriage is OK, why not group marriage." 10.

BACKLASH to Same-Sex Marriage

David Blankenhorn, a family scholar and researcher, is the founder and president of the Institute for American Values, an academic think tank dealing with the importance of families. In his book, The Future of Marriage he challenges the movement toward gay marriages. He writes, "Marriage is fundamentally about the needs of children...What children need most are mothers and fathers. Not caregivers, Not parent-like adults...the mother and the father who together made the child, who love the child, and who love each other... Redefining marriage to include gay and lesbian couples would eliminate entirely in law, and weaken still further in culture, the basic idea of a mother and a father for every child... Once this proposed reform becomes law, even to say the words out loud in public ...would probably be viewed as explicitly divisive and discriminatory, possibly even as hate speech." 11.

In November of 2009 the National Organization for Marriage under the leadership of Rick Santorum and Maggie Gallagher invited the American people to join the Two Million for Marriage Campaign to tell Congress: "Enough, Don't Mess with Marriage!" The concern focused on a bill introduced by Congressman Jerrold Nadler to repeal the Defense of Marriage Act (DOMA). Santorum notes, "If we don't act today, President Obama, Nancy Pelosi, and others in Congress will succeed in their efforts to repeal DOMA, an effort which the White House has already noted is one of its highest 'civil rights' priorities."

Dr. James Dobson, founder of Focus on The Family, donated $25,000 to the National Organization for Marriage. He said, "It's not just marriage that is at stake; it's absolutely everything." 12.

REFERENCES

1. The Gay Almanac. Compiled by the National Museum & Archive of Lesbian and Gay History. New York: Berkley Books. 1996:231,235.

2. Ibid:258.

3. Advocate.com. "Hawaii Gay Marriage, 10 years later." http://www.advocate.com/printArticle.aspx?id=102704. Nov. 20, 2009.

Goldberg, Carey. "Hawaii Judge Ends Gay-Marriage Ban." New York Times (NYTime.com)

December 4,1996.

DOMA Watch. "Federal Defense of Marriage Act (DOMA)" Alliance Defense Fund. 2008.

http://www.domawatch.org/about/federaldoma.html. 2/17/1020.

4. Daniels, Matt. "United, We Fall". World magazine. Vol. 15, No. 24, June 17, 2000:65-67.

5. Daniels, Matt. Ibid.

Drummond, Tammerlin. "The Marrying Kind". Time. Vol. 157, No. 19. May 14, 2001:52.

6. Seelye, Katharine Q. and Janet Elder. "Discomfort over gays seen on rise. San Antonio

Express News. Sunday, December 21, 2003:15A.

7. Buss, Dale. "Gay activists seek to repeal state marriage amendments in U.S." Citizen. Vol. 23, No. 10. Dec. 2009:8.

8. Fitzpatrick, Laura. "Spotlight - Same-Sex Marriage." Time. Vol. 175, No. 3. Jan.25, 2010:20.

9. Blankenhorn, David. The Future of Marriage. New York: Encounter Books. 2007:xii.

10. Ibid:130-137.

11. Ibid:2-3.

12. Santorum, Rick. National Organization for Marriage. www.TwoMillionForMarriage.com. Nov. 2009.